So I watched The Room yesterday. It is amazing how much that film fails. I don’t know if Tommy Wiseau is a genius or a complete moron, but he managed to make the perfect example of how not to make a movie. It’s so bad that I can’t even cover everything wrong in it, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to try. So, without any further stalling, let’s do this.
Useless Plot Points: There are too many to cover them in the detail they deserve, so I’m just gonna stick with one example: Denny’s Drug problem. Early on in the film the character Denny has his life threatened by a man, who claims that Denny owes him money. Denny isn’t killed and two other character drag the man away, supposedly to get arrested. It is revealed that Denny owes him money for drugs. It’s a tense scene with characters actually acting like humans (which is a rare thing) and it is never mentioned again. No one even looks shaken after it’s over and no one acts as if they see Denny differently.
Horrible Writing: This movie constantly breaks the ‘show don’t tell’ rule of movie making. A character insists that another character is his best friend, despite the fact that they don’t even have a scene together until the middle of the movie. A character lies about being pregnant but we only hear about it after she tell another character, and THAT character announces it.
People also say things that make no sense. The line, “How is your sex life?” is asked in a very public place, just in case asking that question could possibly be OK to ask. The protaganist laughs at a story of a women getting beaten up by her boyfriend, and it’s seems to be set up in a way to have us laugh with him. I could go on but it’s easier to say, “This movie seems to have been written by aliens who wish to mimic us and fail miserably.”
Fuck This Movies Editing: In one of the first scenes a character hair is up, then down, then up again, and then down… again. There are random shots of San Francisco to show transitions from one setting to another, but sometimes they do one of these shots and then go back to the same fucking scene!
The Actors: Not all of the acting is bad because the actors are bad. You can tell that some people were really trying but others… are terrible. They reach a transcendent kind of terrible where it becomes hilarious, but that’s still terrible.
One actor quit before his scenes were finished, so they replace him with a new guy and pretended like it never happened. We know it happened though, because they didn’t even bother refilming the scenes he was in… I guess that should also count against this movies editing and direction.
Conclusion (of this post): See this movie. Check and see if it is playing anytime in the future at a theater you can get to. If it isn’t then find another way. This movie is perfectly bad. It reaches the nirvana of bad. It has risen to the full understanding of the universe… of bad! I didn’t even cover everything wrong with it, because there is to much. If nothing else, see it because it’s really fucking funny.
Until next time, I’m a Rambling Fangirl and I’m stealing this joke from the Nostalgia Critic.
